It’s 5am. It is OK to hate reality. You know you want to. Go ahead. I grant thee permission.
Oh, you’re right: the other half of the blog post title represents a more stoic and less detached approach to life, and while, on a good day, y’might resolve to this state, you’re likely to have an initial set of cortisol-driven, fear-based reactions.
And I say: embrace it …for a bit …because you’re human and this is part of the experience …and you only live twice. (#YOLT)
This isn’t a post about how an emotionally mature way to handle change we don’t at first like is to recall Bill Belichick’s, “it is what it is”.
This isn’t a post about how it is more spiritually sustainable to remove outcome from life events, and to go with the flow.
This isn’t even a post about allowing yourself to feel emotions (even though that’s how I’m starting all this).
It is about how the title is “Reality Now Sucks, AND is also Just Different”, and not “Reality Now Sucks, BUT is also Just Different”. Continue reading →
What’s the worst place to have an epiphany about your whole approach to life being wrong?
At work. In a meeting. Run by you. About your approach to life.
“Why Agile?” was the topic of our bi-weekly Agile Guild gathering: when to ‘use it’ and when not to ‘use it’. Answer: When tasks are complex, not simple. What’s another way of thinking about complexity? There’s high discoverability & low predictability. I just saved you the bulk of an hour-long discussion. You’re welcome.
No mind-blowing epiphanies yet. So far, we gucci.
All of a sudden, fellow Scrum Master Stephen busted out a cautionary quote about ‘using Agile’, a version of which I like is:
If the only tool you have is a hammer, you tend to see every problem as a nail. – Abraham Maslow
Well, in Asheville they say – that the Merrill’s small head grew three sizes that day. (And then – the true meaning of Agile came through, and the Merrill found the strength of tenGrinches Merrills, plus two!)
After dinner, the table mostly put away, and our daughter’s toys mostly… not put away (yet), the CD player goes on, and the dance party begins.
Matt Heaton steps the tiny masses through basic behavioural norms like stopping and going. Then there’s a Wombat Dance. (We have a 2-year-old, so this all makes sense.) Before Matt, but still in popular rotation, we had Karen K and the Jitterbugs, wherein you, too, may want to be a Jitterbug, or have Pancakes for Dinner.
At some parentally appointed point, the music stops.
At some later painfully negotiated point, toys are put away.
At some even later peacefully navigated point, our daughter is in bed.
At this point, I’m pretty useless.
There’s 1-2 hours left in regulation time before the daily game is over, and I’m not really in the mood for anything creative or productive. Personal growth-related activities? Pfft, grrrl, please.
Ever wanted to be a mad scientist? As a Biomedical Engineer, my version of this involved lab coats, organs, and Southern accents.
If you drive North from Boston on I-95, before you get to New Hampshire, you’ll see on your right an Alfalfa farm. You’ll know because it is written out in what should be wrought iron.
If you take a Systems Physiology class in college, you’ll learn how the kidney’s mostly passive filtration system is truly magical. You’ll know because your kidneys will vibrate warmly. Giving you a hug. From the inside.
If you put those 2 together, you logically derive the motivation for studying Tissue Engineering in grad school: the commercial for Merrill’s Kidney Farm.
Picture folks in thick-rimmed glasses, wearing overalls, and white lab coats. Cue that Southern accent… Continue reading →
She covers her ‘notsorry’ method, which guards your time and treasure without you feeling like a… jerk. She ends her talk thus:
But mental decluttering: learning how to say ‘no’, set boundaries, and give fewer, better fucks? That lasts forever.
So decide what you don’t give a fuck about (know your ‘fuck budget’). Then don’t give a fuck about those things (honestly & politely). 12.5-minute video embedded below to better get this message. Enjoy!
Oh, and yeah, she audibly drops the F-bomb. A lot. But otherwise, it’s SFW!